What is the Patriarchy, the Language of the Patriarchy, & the Institutional Separation from Nature
The patriarchy has been spawned by the (male-identifying) mind over at least six thousand years with the sole purpose of reversing the female body’s reproductive advantage. By means of language & psychology, education & currency, religion & accreditation, law & military, & the numerous other constructs of the mind (& its chemistry), it has sought to organize & perpetuate this cultural role reversal of the biological body’s gender-based reproductive dependency/terror. The terror of being alone & mortal.
Society as we know it exists to protect men from women because Nature favors women, so Society favors men. Because women are the generators of life. Women are the sexual generators of energy. Women are the biological creators. Women are the sex.
The fundamental social thought dogma is that we are not a whole human being composed of body & mind, or body & soul — an I — but we are a mind in charge of a body (or a soul inhabiting a body). The devaluation of the body that we exist in is an enormous cultural construct that sits as an enormous burden on each one of us. The primacy of the mind over the living body is a part of the most insidious & personalized propaganda of the patriarchy. The control of the body over the rest of our body is the lie we are taught since our earliest consciousness. Our own daily experience confirms to us that it can’t be true, & yet we proceed to act with each other as if it is because that’s the power of our fundamental need to be together.
So, Society has regulated our values, laws, words, and habits. It has determined that our rights & wrongs, our norms & our big themes, our customs & our fears, our gods & our demons exist to protect itself/men from women.
It’s not the individual men’s fault. It’s the men’s burden too & it’s time in 21st century America to rewrite those codes. Sex is the easiest way to do that because everyone wants & needs & deserves to have consensual good healthy sex & because sex isn’t already articulated, unlike every other aspect of our lives.
The most important reason to learn to Speak Sex is to revisit & reconsider our learned inherited cliche attitudes toward sex. As we learn its language & proper definitions, we can move away from, forget and refuse the passed-down model of provider sex that undoes our intimacy. I propose to take this one step further, to bring gender equality through this sexual practice of articulation & negotiation. In solidarity I say to you: speak to your lover.
Patriarchy’s original sin was to separate God from Nature. It created Imbalance in humans. The purpose of patriarchy since its inception has been to protect men from women. The history of men in power is the history of men raping women. Rape is the result of empowerment & the urge for punishment, an expression of dominance & power, & the enjoyment of it. So long as rape occurs, there’s no equality. In many patriarchal societies, women didn’t have their own names but carried the names of their fathers & husbands. More recently men used the language of Love to get women & keep women enslaved.
For most of written history (which I call the patriarchy) women have been chattel, objects traded among men who don’t birth us & yet legally own us. Equality before the law is an amazing improvement to what was but the most important improvement in our social standing has to take place in our own consciousness. We are homemakers & babymakers & mothers & that’s an awesome privilege we shouldn’t complain about in our quest to be like men. Our freedom starts where our prejudices end: do we want to be taken care of by a man who’s a good provider in exchange for bearing & raising his children & managing his household? Do we find that reassuring? Is it cost effective to give up our agency? Let’s examine the cost closely.
This is the first generation in the history of the patriarchy where women get to give sexual consent. When we consent to receive sex, we also give men permission to receive. When we consent to be objectified, we agree to objectify our partners in exchange. The only way to evolve out of the patriarchy is for women to own sex, the entire practice of sex which affects women’s bodies fundamentally. The way for us to regain our biological equilibrium is to give women back the procreative advantage inherent in the instinct of sex. We can gain equality through conscious, free, and fearless sex. Not socially conditioned or illicit sex, but to live a sexually non-binary life in a 200-character, short attention, high emotional flare culture, & how to be sex positive in rape culture. This is my starting point.
